You

Te amo, con todo mi corazon.

Tu eres todo para mi.

Te necesito.

The "Circle" Of Life

I realise now that there is an order to life.
I wouldn't necessarily say it is a circle...
More like and oval.
Large in the middle and narrower at the two ends.
But it doesn't have a circular flow.
I'd rather think of it as a ladder.
With many, many rungs upon it.
Ranging from those who are worst off, to those living to their heart's content.
But this is not just about money, fame or wealth.
It is about happiness.
You see, at the bottom of the ladder are those who are depressed.
People who have suffered their entire lives.
Yet, these people who suffer are kind-hearted, willing to give up everything.
You remember how I said it was a ladder right?
Well these people at the bottom are always stepped on.
Used like a stepping stone to reach higher up the ladder.
Which leads me to the middle of this ladder.
Where a majority of people are.
From somewhat happy to quite.
They are ignorant and selfish and quite content.
But when times are tough, they begin to slide down the ladder.
Until someone at the bottom boosts them back up.
Now, for the top of the ladder.
It is unbelievably rare for someone to reach the top.
An individual who has reached the penultimate goal in life.
True happiness.
A person who accepts who they are and what they have.
Never wanting more than they need.
That is a rare person indeed.
Almost impossible to believe.
But it should be possible.
Somewhere out there, there is someone with such happiness.
But never forget those who help you to reach happiness.
Those depressed, self-loathing people who skirt at the ladder's base.
Those who will always be there to support you no matter how dire their situation is.
These are just the building blocks of life.
This order seems to be the way things just work out.

I'm falling, further and further into the darkness.
I can barely grasp the first rung of the ladder.
My grip grows weaker and weaker.
Until I'm holding on by my fingertips.
Is this the end?

Acknowledgement

永遠など無い わかっていたつもりだよ

That's why I'm not even going to try.

悲しみ

Losing the ability to smile.
Just watching, waiting.
But it all seems so surreal.
Maybe it's all just an illusion?
A dream that I'll never wake up from.
Or maybe what I'm hoping for is a dream?
All I can see is this road stretching beyond me.
My hands gently guiding the wheel.
The headlights reaching into the darkness ahead.
All I can do is watch the white lines along the road.
Hoping they come to an end.
Hoping I'll find the answer.
But it never seems to end.
There is no fairytale, no happy ending.
Only more and more of the road ahead.
Is that all life has to offer?
This endless road filled with sadness and loneliness?
Maybe I'm just forbidden to be happy.

11.11.11 11:11:11

My wish can't be granted.

I don't have a wish.

Disbelief

No one in this world can live alone.
Challenge accepted.
I seem to be doing a fucking good job so far.

Decisions, Decisions

There comes a time when you need to look at who is in your life, who you want in your life, who you need in your life and who you need to get out of your life.

Fake It

Sometimes, you just have to smile, pretend everything's okay, hold back the tears, and just walk away.

Loved Ones

Are you scared of losing someone?
Could you deal with it?

You don't know the answers.
That's why you'll never understand.

No More Believing

The idea of romance is dead to me.
Blind faith was never my strong suit.
Why do people say they're 'in love'?
Do you truly feel a connection to that person?
Or is it something much closer to the surface?
Something...superficial.
I can't understand the motive behind it.
Why bother if there's nothing there?
You're only wasting you're time.
That's why I've given up.
Love is dead in my eyes.

You feel it don't you?
The coldness in your soul.
The ice that tears at your heart.
You can run, you can hide.
But it will always be there.
Waiting to drag you down.
Like an anchor in the sea.
You can never escape the cold.
It only lurks beneath the surface.
And it's going to drag you down.

Is wanting to die normal? Probably.

Do You Know Anything At All?

People always think they know other people, but they don't.
Not really. I mean, maybe they know things about them, like they won't eat doughnuts or they like action movies or whatever.
But they don't know what their friends do in their rooms alone at night or what happened to them when they were kids or if they feel fucked up and sad for no reason at all.

Don't pretend like you know me.
You can't just tell me to cheer up and expect things to be sunshine and rainbows again.
Nothing is ever that simple.
There's a lot you don't know.
Things that even I don't know.
But I'm searching for answers.
Maybe one day I'll tell you what I find.
Then maybe you'll understand.
But until then don't even try.
There's just some things you'll never know.


依然愛你 - 王力宏

我依然愛你 或許是 命中注定
多年之後 任何人都無法代替
那些時光是我這一輩子最美好的
那些回憶 依然無法忘記

我依然愛你 就是 唯一的退路
我依然珍惜 時時刻刻的幸福
你每個呼吸 每一個動作 每個表情
到最後 一定會
依然愛你

What's Left?

Everything comes back to haunt me.
Back then, it was all fun and games.
At least to you anyway.
For me, those are just painful memories.
You'll never know how screwed up this is.
You'll never know anything.
Because now, there's nothing left.

Last Chance - Maroon 5

Out of sight not out of mind
You want the world, I'll give you mine
Cause your the girl I'll never find
And I'm the boy you left behind
I bet you think you're satisfied

I don't think you'll ever understand.
That person you left behind doesn't exist anymore.
So don't ever try coming back.
You ruined so much for me.
Every occasion I once held special.
My birthday, Christmas and the list goes on.
Now all I have left is this storm of self-loathing and despair.
And all that is hidden behind my composure.
A facade of lies.
That's what is left behind.
A mess, a wreck, a disaster.
How could you?
You ignored everything I ever said to you.
I confided in you.
Was it all a big mistake? Yes.
I should have never trusted you.
I should have known better.
But now I know.
All your lies are so clear now.
But it doesn't matter.
I'm better off without you.
I'd rather be who I am now than be with you.
Because when I see you now, I realise how much better off I am.
Even if I am alone, at least I have self respect.
Actually I don't, but at least I'm not like you.
This fucked up piece of shit that I am, is better than what you're doing right now.
Taking advantage of other people like me.
I wish I could say I hate you.
Unfortunately I understand everything you did.
It was typical of you.
I just couldn't see until now.
But that doesn't matter.

We were never meant to be.
Because I'm meant to be this way.
I'm just hoping that this will be over soon.

Lies

Everyone tells lies.
Some hurt, others don't.
But would you tell a lie for the greater good?
To get you through the night?

Just A Feeling - Maroon 5

Obsessed, depressed at the same time
I can't even walk in a straight line
I'm a light in the dark, no sunshine
No sunshine, no sunshine

She cries, "This is more than goodbye
When I look into your eyes
You're not even there"

It's just a feeling, just a feeling, just a feeling that I have
Just a feeling, just a feeling that I have
'Cause it's just a feeling, just a feeling, just a feeling
(I can't believe that it's over)

I think I finally understand.
I told myself a lie.
One I could easily believe.
One that made it right in mind.
But really, there was no justification.
Only infatuation.

What is this word love that we throw around?
I thought I understood.
But each and every day I find the meaning slipping away.
It's so complex, so screwed up.
There's so much I wish I could understand.
But now is not the time.
I doubt there ever will be a time.
One day it will just hit me, like today's epiphany.
I'm sorry.
I keep searching and when I get close I run away.
Much like a bomb.
Unstable, complex, destructive.
But that's not the point.
To those that I've hurt I apologise.
I keep running away from the truth.
I keep fabricating lies to justify my actions.
In reality, I'm the one who's done wrong.

I wish I really knew what all this meant.
I had it once.
It was crystal clear in my mind before.
But now I'm tainted, broken.
I doubt I'll ever find what it means again.
Let alone, experience it again.
Do I continue to live in the dark?
Or do I seek the light?
I don't know.
I don't think I ever will.

Misery

Misery - Maroon 5

I'm desperate and confused, so far away from you
I'm getting there, I don't care where I have to roam

Why do you do what you do to me, yeah?
Why won't you answer me, answer me yeah?
Why do you do what you do to me yeah?
Why won't you answer me, answer me yeah?

I am in misery
And there ain't nobody who can comfort me, oh yeah
Why won't you answer me?
The silence is slowly killing me, oh yeah

Beyond Repair

Some things are just not worth fixing.

And frankly, I'm one of them.

What Happened?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=StCtPtPtmkc

If only time was so forgiving...

How does it feel, knowing that you're going to die alone?

Back To The Days

Falling in love with techno all over again.

Heaven - DJ Sammy

Baby you're all that I want
When you're lying here in my arms
I'm finding it hard to believe
We're in heaven

I feel...restricted.

Food For Thought

What doesn't kill us, only makes us bitter.

Man Up

Stop being so fucking weak.
You have better things to do right now.
Or more important anyway.
Quit moping.
If you want things to change, do it yourself.
Whining won't get you anywhere.
Just have to suck it up and move on.

Heaven - Big Bang

逢いたくて　逢いたくて
あの海で　待っているよ
君への想い　朝も昼も夜も
逢いたくて You are my heaven

Here We Go Again

These past few months have really changed our friendship.
Its still awkward as hell, but things are starting to go back to normal.
But I don't think they'll ever be the same.
Too much has happened between us.
We're so conservative now, it makes me laugh.
What happened to our...more reckless days?
I guess this is just part of growing up.
And to be completely honest, it wasn't such a bad thing.
Sure, we did some bad things.
But we both learnt a lot.
So it wasn't completely horrible.
Well it was.
I guess I'm just trying to justify my actions. In hindsight.
Sigh. I don't know why you don't hate me.

아파 - 2NE1

우린 이미 늦은 건가요
우리 사랑 끝난 건가요
거짓말이라도 좀 아니라고 해줘요
이젠 더 잘할 수 있는데
다시 만날 수는 없지만
오늘 밤 나만이 아파요

변했니 네 맘속에
이제 난 더 이상 없는 거니
난 널 널 생각하면
너무 아파 아파 아파

더 이상 예전의 네가 아니야
내가 사랑한 너와 지금에 네가 너무도 달랐어
그저 멍하니
멀어지는널 바라보고만 서서 울었어
No way, I can't recognize
You're not mine anymore

That chapter of our lives is over.
And now we're starting all over again.
Let's take the path we should have in the first place.
And hope no one gets hurt this time.

Torn

I want to dance.
But I really should be studying.
See, I could dance.
But then I'd feel bad about not studying.
Less than 3 weeks til it starts.
6 weeks til its all over.
That's not so bad.

Beautiful - B2ST

So beautiful my girl oh oh girl oh oh girl 시간이 지나도
누구보다 내가 더 더 더 너를 아껴줄게 my girl 모두 다 줄게
너 [U] 너에게 (You) 에에게 oh oh
니가 멀리 있어도 느낄 수 있어 I’m always dreaming about you
지금보다 내가 더 더 더 너를 사랑할게 my girl you you you my girl
(You) oh beautiful (you) so beautiful (you) my beautiful nothing better than you
oh beautiful (you) so beautiful (you) my beautiful nothing better than you

STUDY GO~
Year 12 2011 FIGHTING!
(can't believe I just said that)

ps: haven't posted a photo in a while so here you go. (my sister drew it)

Only a Dream Away

U-Kiss - Neverland

Come on, come on, don’t hesitate and grab my hand
Through the forest of buildings in the sky, I will fly
Everything you believe is reality
Scattered beneath your feet are hundreds of millions of stars

Nights without sleep, throughout this night
Tell the DJ turn it up up up and da-da-dance a little more
More nights, through more nights
You will be a girl forever, girl and we stay forever young

(Oh you) I will only go with you (A fantasy that isn’t far away)
To this word full of imagination
Without an end, never end, this is Neverland

The universe is endless.
There is still so much to be discovered.
So many mysteries that are yet to be proven.
But, there are still so many problems that must be dealt with first.
Things that keep us grounded to the earth.
Things that inhibit our full potential.
Things that stop us from flying away to a NEVERLAND.



Edit: 444 views when I checked today. Is it a sign?

Why Me?

What did I do to deserve this?
You claimed that you could help, that you could fix me.
But really, when the dust settles, I'm left further behind.
Oh yes, go ahead and say that you tried.
Because really, in the end you didn't help at all.
You only made things worse.
But it's not entirely your fault.
My fault too.
For falling for you, letting myself be used.
I'm just a toy to you.
Why do I even bother?

Anyway, I've got this stuck in my head right now.

Step - KARA

Step it up step it up 다시 시작이야
또 템포를 올려서 앞질러 갈래
Just step it up step it up 다 보란 듯이
크게 볼륨 높여 baby my baby

Lalalalalalalalalala~
Lalalalalalalalalala~

Things Never Change

Will you give it a rest?
You, them or anyone else, for that matter, will never change this.
It's just meant to be.
And I can't change it.
So how can you expect someone else to?

All alone
I’m all alone
I’m all alone
I’m always alone

I'm _______ _____.

I Miss You

I really wish you were still here.
Why did you have to leave?

DBSK - どうして君を好きになってしまったんだろう?

どうして…君を好きになってしまったんだろう?
どんなに時が流れても君はずっと
ここにいると　思ってたのに

でも君が選んだのは違う道

どうして…君に何も伝えられなかったんだろう?
毎日毎晩募ってく想い
溢れ出す言葉　解ってたのに(もう届かない)

初めて出会ったその日から　君を知っていた気がしたんだ
あまりに自然に溶け込んでしまったふたり
何処へ行くのにも一緒で　君がいることが当然で
僕らはふたりで大人になってきた

There's nothing I can do but move on.
But even that's impossible to do.
You were the one for me.
But now I'm just alone.

それでも…君が僕のそば　離れていっても
永遠に君が幸せであること　ただ願ってる
(例えそれがどんなに寂しくても)
辛くても…

Why Isn't It Over?

I thought it had passed.
But I was wrong.
Why do I still get this feeling?
Oh well, just have to accept it and move on.
Unfortunately, this is the way life goes.
So suck it up princess and lets go.

Ne-yo - Because Of You

Think of it every second
I can't get nothing done,
Only concern is the next time, I'm gonna get me some
Know I should stay away from, cause it's no good for me
I try and try but my obsession wont let me leave

I got a problem and I don't know what to do about it
Even if I did, I don't know if I would quit but I doubt it
I'm taken by the thought of it, and I know this much is true
Baby, you have become my addiction, I'm so strung out on you
I can barely move but I like it

And it's all because of you (all because of you)
And it's all because…
Never get enough,
She's the sweetest drug

What is wrong with me?
Always wanting something I can't have.
But that's just life.

Moving On

No this post isn't what you think about.
It's cos I've GRADUATED from high school.
But really, it's just another step forward.
I've only completed one small step of my life.
There's many more things ahead.
HSC (sigh), Uni (YAY) etc etc.

Memories - David Guetta Ft. Kid Cudi

All the crazy shit I did tonight
Those will be the best memories
I just wanna let it go for the night
That would be the best therapy for me

All the crazy shit I did tonight
Those will be the best memories
I just wanna let it go for the night
That would be the best therapy for me

All that's left are memories.
But it doesn't mean you should forget.
Because they will be undoubtedly, some of the best times of your life.
Before the world gets too complicated and shit.
Just treasure what little time is left.
Because it will be gone before you know it.

Who Do You Think You Are?

I'm really starting to hate these kinds of people.
Those people who think they own everything.
Who think they know everything.
And most importantly, think they can get away with anything.

Jar of Hearts - Christina Perri

I've learned to live, half alive
And now you want me one more time

It took so long just to feel alright
Remember how to put back the light in my eyes
I wish I had missed the first time that we kissed
‘Cause you broke all your promises
And now you're back
You don't get to get me back

Who do you think you are?
Runnin' 'round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
Don't come back for me
Don't come back at all

Have a heart.
As ironic as that sounds with the song above, really.
Think about what you're doing to someone.
How harmful and bitchy it is.
Be considerate.
Just words alone can have such an effect on a person.
Think about your actions too.
You've no idea what that person is going through.

Smile

Did you know?
It takes 41 muscles to frown, but only 17 to smile?
So smile, it conserves energy.
Anyway, about smiles.
They really do light up a room.
They really do bring a warmth to the atmosphere.
And most of all, they really do make you happier.

Smile - Michael Jackson

Smile, though your heart is aching
Smile, even though it's breaking
When there are clouds in the sky
You'll get by...

If you smile
With your fear and sorrow
Smile and maybe tomorrow
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just...

Light up your face with gladness
Hide every trace of sadness
Although a tear may be ever so near
That's the time you must keep on trying
Smile, what's the use of crying
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just...

I know it can be really hard to smile.
But really, it will make others and yourself happy.
And if the people are around you are happy, you will be happy too.

3 Months Later

So now you finally decide to show up.
Well, you seem okay.
Things seem to be fine with the both of you.
I wish you luck and happiness.

As for me, not much has changed.
I'm still that stupid guy who almost ruined your life right?
Well, don't worry.
I do learn from my mistakes.
I'll never do something like that again.
But still, things will never be the same.
I'm sorry.

R U OK?

It only takes up a little of your time.
But just these few words can make such a difference.
You have no idea how much it brightens someone's day just to know someone cares.

The girl you just called fat? She is overdosing on diet pills. The girl you just called ugly? She spends hours putting makeup on hoping people will like her. The boy you just tripped? He is abused enough at home. See that man with the ugly scars? He fought for our country. That guy you just made fun of… for crying? His mother is dying. If you are against bullying. --- Save a life. National Suicide Prevention Week ♥
Thursday 15 September, 2011 is R U OK? Day.

You inspire me. You used to be so...depressed.
But look at you now.
Things are looking up for you now.
I hope I can do the same.

Life Isn't Fair

First of all:
Cheer up, I'm here for you.

Anyway, back to the main post.
Life isn't fair.
As much as we'd like to think it is, there's just no way it can be.
Just accept this simple fact, it makes things a lot easier.
Although, I like to think karma helps (:
Putting that aside, I find its just easier to get on with life.
Don't worry about being rich or famous.
Just do what you can.
Try your best. No one can blame you for that.

Accept It

Not everything will turn out the way you want it to in life.
Accept what you have, and what you don't have and go from there.
There will always be an opportunity to be better, to do better.
It's just up to you if you want to take it or not.
And then there's others, who want to shortcut.
But that will just make you unhappy.
The key to success is not cheating, or taking shortcuts.
It's hard work and attitude.
You only reap what you sow.
You only get out what you put in.

Can't Nobody - 2NE1

Can’t nobody hold us down
Nothing’s gonna take us down
And you think you can stop it
But we just can’t stop it tonight
Can’t nobody hold us down
Can’t nobody can’t nobody hold us down
We gon’ keep it goin’ bout to run this town
Can’t nobody can’t nobody hold us down
Cuz we keep rockin’ we keep rockin’ (Yeah)

I know that by just sitting here and doing nothing I won't achieve anything.
And I know that I have to change myself before I can do anything.
Your greatest enemy is yourself.
You're the only holding yourself back.
So just let it go.
Aim high.
Be the best that you can be.

Love

The look on your face when I told you he was here.
I can't describe it, but you looked so happy.
You said you "get that feeling" with him and it shows.
I'm glad you found someone that you want to be with.
As long as you're happy.

We Belong Together - Big Bang

(Oh)Baby, your love is so mind-blowing(Oh yea)
I need you, gotta please you my girl
And that's for life-long (Oh baby, baby)
Baby, you know we're so right flowin'
Indeed we got a thing, can't no one ever deny

Love is often a word that gets thrown around too often. Misused.
But one day, you will find out what it truly means.
You will understand it, and you won't ever have to say it.
Because when you find out, you will have found the one you love.
Love is a feeling, it doesn't need to be said.

Apologies

Lately I've done a lot of things half-heartedly.
I've left a lot of things unsaid.
It's probably too late but some things just need to be done.

What Have I Done - Ne-Yo

Selfishly
Catered to my own desires
Never once thinking
That breaking rules just cuz I wanted to
Could possibly hurt you
My only concern was me
And now look at you
Look at what my foolishness has turned you into

What have I done
What have I done
What have I done
What have I done
I'm to blame
Love is a privilege
Not a game

1. I'm so sorry, I really am. I think the song above says what I really feel. I hurt the both of you and I really didn't mean to. I know you won't read this but I just need to get this off my mind. I still wonder if you're okay and how things are going. I miss you, but I think we're better off this way.

2.I don't know what I should say. It seems our friendship is built on these mutual feelings and worries. Despite this, we don't really say much and I'm sorry for that. Maybe cause we're so alike? I don't know. All I know is I appreciate having you around.

3.Sorry, I'm really screwed in the head eh? I had to choose now, probably the worst time in our lives. But it doesn't matter, its all sorted now. So I guess, sorry and thankyou.

4. I don't know how you've put up with me since we met. I keep on relying on you for my own stupid little mistakes. And for that, I'm sorry. I'm glad you were there for me, but don't worry. I'm looking up and I ain't looking back.

Anyway, I think sometimes these things need to be said.
It's important to get these things out even if it won't be read.
It really takes a lot off my mind.

Hopes And Dreams

Life is a bitch.
Simple as that.
There will always be pain and hurt, but that doesn't mean you let it get to you.
In fact, take the good out of it.
I've lost people before.
But they continue to live in my memory.
I carry their hopes and dreams.

Remember - Big Bang

(We both looked out for each other)
For each other yeah
(In this world there was no other)
There was no other no
(What happened to our love that)
Even if nothin changes I just wanna remember

Remember when we fought for each other
(Do you remember)
All we cared about was our love (all we cared about)
Remember when the itty bit mattered
All that happened to us do you remember
Remember when we fought for each other
(Do you remember)
All we cared about was our love (ooh)
Now I remember (ay)
One thing got in the (way)
Let's go back to the (day)
Do you remember?

I know what they would have wanted.
I still remember the time I spent with them as if it were yesterday.
And I remember what you guys wanted in life.
I will get there for you.

The Waiting Game.

So it's HSC soon.
I really should be studying.
But instead, I'm here thinking about that.
After HSC I can do whatever.
Yeah, something like that.
But it doesn't matter to me at the moment.
I'm way too caught up.
Bad timing.
That's what it was.

Next Day - Seungri

Inevitably I wake up and check the phone next to my head
I take a deep breath and for awhile try to recall what happened the night before
Then I take another deep breath

About what I had said
And if I made you uncomfortable
You, I held onto you, even though you said you hated me
I can only remember saying i miss you, and calling out the name that caused me pain

You didn't say no.
But you hinted at something later?
Maybe I'm reading way too deeply into this.
Perhaps you were just being nice?
If so, then it's ok.
I'll be fine.
Because no matter what, the sun is still shining.

Let It Be

Let It Be - The Beatles

And when the broken hearted people
Living in the world agree,
There will be an answer, let it be.
For though they may be parted there is
Still a chance that they will see
There will be an answer, let it be.

Let it be, let it be.
Let it be, let it be.
Yeah, There will be an answer, let it be.

Let it be, let it be.
Let it be, let it be.
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be.

What will happen, will happen.
It could be when you least expect it.
Just give it time.

If Tomorrow Never Comes...

So, I'm dreading tomorrow.
Don't ask why, I just am.
But it did make me think.
What if tomorrow never comes?

Baby Goodnight - GD and TOP

Baby good night (Don't wanna say goodbye)
Baby good night (Don't wanna say goodbye)
Baby good night (Don't wanna say goodbye)
Baby good night (Don't wanna say goodbye)

If tomorrow never comes what will you do?
What would you say?
What would you do?
Unfortunately, you can never know if tomorrow will come or not.
(Although most likely it will.)
But that's beside the point.
Live everyday like it's your last.
Life's too short for regrets.
Who knows what could happen.
If you have something to say or do, go ahead.
Don't hold back.

Sleep

Lately I've been lacking sleep.
It's really annoying when you spend half your day trying to stay awake during school.
But it does give me a lot of time to think.
And it makes me realise things could be a lot worse.
I've had my fair share of shit in life.
But I'm still thankful that I have clothes, food and a house.

Lonely - 2NE1

Baby I’m sorry, even when I’m with you, I’m Lonely
I must be lacking when it comes to love, please forgive this person horrible person I am
I’m sorry, this is your and my story
I must not be worthy of this thing called love, even though I’m by your side
Baby I’m so lonely lonely lonely lonely lonely
Baby I’m so lonely lonely lonely lonely lonely
Baby I’m so lonely lonely lonely lonely lonely
Baby I’m so lonely lonely lonely lonely lonely

But there are other things.
Things wrong with myself.
I know.
And I'm sorry for everyone who's had to put up with it.
But I've made up my mind.
I know what I to do.
Just get up and move on.
I will make the sun shine again.

A Time Machine

Ever wondered about having a time machine?
What would you do with it?
I want to go back to the time when life wasn't so complicated.

Don't Cry - Park Bom

Love seems to change so easily,
In place of our own greed, a painful scar is left,
Gotta let you go
And please don’t cry

It’s okay baby please don’t cry,
This long journey is about to end.
But someday, we will meet again,
In the next life, we will see each other again

I've lost a lot of things in my life.
I wish I could just re-live them.
I don't have to change the past or redo those moments again.
Just being able to spend time with you would be enough.
Because, I love you.
I can never forget you.
You have a special place in my heart.
It would probably hurt you to see me now.
I miss you, I love you and I will see you again someday.
When I finally find happiness I will be able to face you again.
Because I know that's what you would have wanted.
I'm trying, I really am.
Please wait for me.

(I'm sorry this has been a really emotional post. But I just want to say that you should treasure your loved ones, don't waste time on people who don't care.)

MJ

R.I.P. Michael Jackson

So, its Michael Jackson week at Crossover.
Entered the $2 battle...and got owned by these pro Japs.
Oh well, it was fun and a good experience.

Anyway, time for the main message.

Man in the Mirror - Michael Jackson

That's Why I Want You To
Know

I'm Starting With The Man In
The Mirror
I'm Asking Him To Change
His Ways
And No Message Could Have
Been Any Clearer
If You Wanna Make The World
A Better Place
(If You Wanna Make The
World A Better Place)
Take A Look At Yourself, And
Then Make A Change
(Take A Look At Yourself, And
Then Make A Change)
(Na Na Na, Na Na Na, Na Na,
Na Nah)

MJ, your songs give so much meaning to those that listen to them.
I don't think I need to say much, these songs pretty much speak for themselves.
But, there is one thing that must be said.
If you want the world to be a better place it all starts with yourself.
You can't do any good in the world if you are a hypocrite.
If you want something to be changed in the world, it all begins with you.

From fighting for racial equality (Black or White) or just entertaining songs (Thriller),
MJ, you truly are, and always will be the King of Pop.

Nothing inspirational and amazing for today.
I'm a bit out of it.
Not to worry.
I have something for tomorrow.

Girls Like You - Miguel

I don't wanna think, I just wanna drink
Cause I'm overcomed by this notion
...

'Cause my heart beats are empty
So once in awhile...
Girls like you remind me that I'm lonely
Yeaaah
Remind me that I'm lonely
...

(心配しないで、ぼくは大丈夫でしょう。)

Fate.

It's a funny thing isn't it?
To think that your whole life could be determined before you're even born.
I'd like to believe in fate, but time and time again it's just my own doing.
Each and every time I would blame the mystery that is fate.
But really, deep down inside I know that it's my fault.
I wish I could break this 3 month rule, but it never seems to happen.
Some would blame that on fate.
But I know it's me. It's my fault.
I plan on changing this.
I don't know how, or even if it's possible.
If there really is some higher power, fuck that.
Take the opportunities that come, grasp them and continue on.
Because you never know what's coming your way.
But you can decide what you will do when the time comes.

Maroon 5 - Nothing Lasts Forever

Built a wall around my heart
I'll never let it fall apart
But strangely I wish secretly
It would fall down while I'm asleep

Everyday
With every worthless word we get more far away
The distance between us makes it so hard to stay
But nothing lasts forever

One cannot simply rely on fate alone.
Sure, it determines a lot of things.
But there are choices that you, alone, must make.

We do not have a choice about what fate gives us.
But we get to decide what we will make of it,
And what path we will take from there.

Ultimately, it's up to yourself. About what life you will have.
What choices will you make?

Anyway a nice photo for today.



(Sigh, I think I'm falling for you. It scares me. I'm not ready yet.)

Fiction or Reality?

I think before i start everyone should watch this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VSkYbgxl93Y

Where do you draw the line between fiction and reality?

I'll be honest, I'm a realist.
But in saying that, its not like I don't have my own dreams.
A world in which I can escape.
But that world, seems so far away. It still does.
And that's because its just a dream.
Although, there is one thing:

Dreams do come true.



I believe the sun will shine again.

However, you can't just sit back and wait for it to happen.
Its your dream, only you can make it happen.
You have to take your own two hands, reach out and grasp your dream.
Its always within your reach, it just depends on how hard you try.
Yes, I know reality is crap. I share that thought too.
But it doesn't matter. That's why we have dreams.
If you do nothing, they are nothing but an escape from reality.
When you try to turn your dreams into reality, happiness ensues.

I Believe I Can Fly - R Kelly

If I can see it, then I can do it
If I just believe it, there's nothing to it
I believe I can fly
I believe I can touch the sky
I think about it every night and day
Spread my wings and fly away
I believe I can soar
I see me running through that open door
I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly

Pursue your dreams.
Because they will bring you true happiness.
No one said it was easy. You just have to try.
And hey,even I fail, it was worth trying.
I'd be happier knowing I got one step closer to my dream.

Hugs!

Ahh, hugs.
They have a mysterious power about them.
The power to make everything alright, when really everything isn't ok.
But what do they mean?

Hugs can mean a lot of things.
Most commonly, hello, goodbye and for cheering people up.
But there's a lot more to them than you think.
Personally, it makes me feel like people care.
I know there are other, non-physical ways to show you care.
But what better way is there than to be close to someone you care about?

Anyway, I'm glad I have people that care about me.
It's really starting to turn my life around.

So Sick - Ne-Yo

And I'm stronger than this
(enough is enough)
No more walking round
With my head down
I'm so over being blue
Crying over you

And I'm so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
So done with wishing you were still here
Said I'm so sick of love songs so sad and slow

And, here's a photo for today.
Cloudgazing.
Try it its relaxing.

Spring!

So spring has come around now.
All I get are images of birds singing, children playing, flowers blooming etc.
(cliched blah blah)
Bye bye Winter. As much as I like you, I want sunshine and warmth.
Cos when it sunny and warm I feel a lot happier.
Although, it really doesn't help us dancers. ITS FREAKIN HOT IN SUMMER!
Regardless, lying in the sun and watching the clouds is fun.
And even better when you have someone to lie next to.
Admittedly I don't have someone like that but it doesn't matter.
It all takes time.

Anyway, back to Spring.
Actually, just the seasons in general.

Seasons of Love - Rent

Remember the love
(Oh you got to, got to)
Remember the love
(Remember the love)
Seasons of love
(Measure measure you life in love)
Seasons of love
Seasons of love

Seasons come and go.
And there's no stopping that.
But despite the passing of time, its always important to never forget who you are.
Nowadays, your identity is so important to you.
It separates those fake bitches and the people who are true to themselves.
Be true to yourself. Its quite possibly, the best thing you can ever do.
Stand up for what you believe in. Don't let other people sway you.
Because only you know what you truly believe.
However, in saying that, don't be stubborn too.
Its always good to take other people's point into consideration.
It can really open your eyes to something better.
Be the best person that you can be.
And people will accept you for that.
If they don't, that's ok too. Don't try to change yourself to belong.
Anyway, the point is, as time passes, people change.
Just don't forget who you are.

What's More Important?

Sometimes we lose sight of what is really important in our lives.
At times like these I like to take a step back and really think about it.
So, recently my friend was in a car accident.
He totally destroyed his car and lost quite a few things in the process.
Nonetheless, he is doing fine, so not to worry.
But it really makes you wonder, what can you afford to lose?
Well, I could leave behind my material possessions in an instant.
Why? Because my life is more important.
But what makes your life fulfilling?
For me its my family and friends.

So, on to today's philosophy lesson.

A philosophy professor stood before his class with some items on the table in front of him.

When the class began, wordlessly he picked up a very large and empty jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into the open areas between the rocks.He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else.He then asked once more if the jar was full. The students agreed unanimously.

The professor then picked up a can of beer and poured it into the jar. The beer filled up the remaining space in the jar. He then asked once more if the jar was full. The students again agreed that it was.

"Now," said the professor, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The rocks are the important things - your family and friends - things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter - like your job and your studies.

The sand is everything else. The small stuff."

"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued "there is no room for the pebbles or the rocks. The same goes for your life.If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Hang out with your friends. Spend time with your family. There will always be time to for work and study.Take care of the rocks first - the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

"What about the beer?", one student asked. At this, the professor laughed. "The beer just goes to show that no matter how full your life is, everyone can do with a drink or two".

Hopefully, everyone can learn from this.
Treasure what you have in your life.
Your friends and family will always be there for you.
And there is always time for the smaller things (like the HSC).
(I also can't disagree with a drink or two every now and then xP)

Go out and enjoy your life.
Because under all the sand and pebbles, are the rocks.
The ones that will always be there, that don't leave your side.

Party Rock Anthem - LMFAO

Party rock is in the house tonight
Everybody just have a good time
And we gonna make you lose your mind
Everybody just have a good time

(As opposed to the Study Hard Anthem)

In the end just go out and get a blast out of life.
Cos that's what life is for, living.
Aim high, cos you never know where it will take you.
(This one's aimed at you, HSC students)



Also, shout out to Savvy, was good seeing you <3

People Who Care

Lately, things have been really quite down.
I've been falling, further and further into a pit of misery and despair.

Abandoned - Jay Park

(Abandoned)
Where did you go-oh-oh-oh
Where did you go-oh-oh-oh
Where did you go
Where did you go
Where did you go-oh-oh-oh
...
Why did you abandon me?

But I think I've finally reached the bottom.
Because finally things are starting to look up.
Maybe its a bit cliched for me to say I can see light, but i really can.
I can finally see the top of this hole I've been digging/ falling into.

Because, I've finally found People Who Care
I used to think I had nothing but dance.
But, dance is about more than just the movement, its the environment too.
Dance has really opened up my life and because of it I've met incredible people.

1. I think you're most important here. You're so much like me. Despite the ENORMOUS hypocrites we both may be, we still look out for each other. I hope things look up for you, remember the whole crew is there for you, not just me.

2. Don't take offense to this okay? You're childish, but grown up at the same time. I call you kiddo, but really you are like a little sister to me. To be honest, I don't think i could stay mad or cold around you. You smile too much (that's a good thing).

3. You probably won't read this, but whatever. I'm glad we met, even if it was just once. And I'm glad I had the courage to talk to you afterwards as well. And now, we're good friends. "You and I clicked like flap jacks", "Yeah, we're cool like that" LOL

4. Ok, so everyone thinks we're a ship. Personally I don't care. We know the truth and let them think what they want. The train rides home have been fun, despite the time you lost/forgot your phone HAHA. I'm glad we can talk and I know you don't reveal much about yourself, but I'm here for you. Even if you try not to show it, I can tell there's something bothering you. Just so you know, you can come to me if you want to talk.

5. You're definitely not going to read this but it doesn't matter. I just want you to know that you should be happy. And just because you're older doesn't mean you can't be with someone younger. It's ok, you still look young (:

6. It's been over a year since I've met you now. And when I look back, I don't regret a thing. We had our ups and downs, but in the end I care a shitload about you and I know you feel the same way. Thank you for always being there.

Anyway, another picture for today.
I think this one shows how i feel right now.
I just want to shoot out of this pit of despair and misery and share my happiness with everyone.



And to cap it off, a different song.
Cos I'm not feeling so Abandoned anymore. Sorry, Jay Park.

10 Points out of 10 - 2pm

La la lalala la la Pretty baby~
La la lalala la la Be my lady~
La la lalala la la Pretty baby~
La la lalala la la Be my lady~

(yes, I'm slowly turning into a kpop fan. Again.)

So, to anyone reading this, I just want you to know there are people that care.
And even in your times of despair and hopelessness, just read this blog.
Or even talk to me! Because everyone looks better when they smile (:

Sickness

So, for the last two days I've been sick and stayed at home all day.
I've texted a lot more than i usually do.
And its made me realise that maybe people do care.
But do they really?

This is a message for all those stressed out HSC students:

Look out for your friends.
Its that simple. At times like these you don't want to lose a friend.
Even if it means staying up til 2am or skipping a few hours of study.
That lost or wasted time (or at least you think its wasted),
Is nowhere near as valuable as your friends and their health.
I mean, imagine trying to do a HSC exam after losing a friend.
Not many people have the emotional strength to even try.
Sometimes, we all just need to take a break.
And in the end, the HSC isn't worth your life.
It doesn't define you or what you can do.
Just try your best, because no one can blame you for that.

Anyway, I thought i should share this photo with you guys today.
I love black and white photos, I don't know why.
But sometimes its good to have a bit of colour in your life (:

The city look so nice from here
Pity I can't see it clearly
While you're standing there, it disappears
It disappears.

Maroon 5 - Better That We Break

Start of a New Blog/Life

So, I've been out of the blogging game for a while.
I almost ragequited at editing html again but i think i finally got it.
Edit: Yes I wasted a lot of time trying to make an awesome blog.
I think ill stick with simple. Simplicity is bliss.

Anyway, out of boredom I've decided to blog.
What to blog about?
Well, I'd like to do things that make people smile.
So I thought I would start by sharing some of my photos with you guys.
Yes, I know, boring huh?
Not to worry, the best is yet to come.
I have other ways to make people smile you know?
Although, I might not blog everyday, I'll try my best.

A quote from a good friend of mine "Everybody needs some care".
I took this to heart and realised, yes everybody does.
So, hopefully through this blog I can share the love with everyone who reads it.
I hope you walk (click) away with a smile (: